But as author Catherine Price explains in How to Break Up with your Phone, "Our lives are what we pay attention to. When we decide what to pay attention to in the moment, we are making a broader decision about how we want to spend our time."
I want to spend time paying attention to my actual life--the people I love, the ways I want to grow and strive, and the things I enjoy doing, which is not ACTUALLY the endless water fill game that mesmerized me when I saw it on Instagram and have been known to get really into when I am mentally spinning out.
I was recently listening to another audiobook in which the author, while hiking with a friend, came across a 30-something man in a loin cloth who was living in the canyon, eating squirrels, and basically exempting himself from our modern life because he considered it overly complicated. While I'm not ready to fully embrace rodents as a dietary choice, and a loin cloth is not nearly warm enough for my sherpa-lined tastes, there's still a part of me that thinks canyon-dweller guy, Jeff I think it was, has it all figured out. I think of Jeff when I feel overwhelmed: when I have 4735 tabs open on my browser trying to figure out how to record a podcast; when I'm trying to listen to someone else's podcast or webinar and simultaneously plan on-brand social media posts; when I hold my 12,000th cup of hot tea and stare at the blinking cursor of this blog wondering if I remembered to add jam to my grocery pick-up; when I wrap a fuzzy blanket around me and look out the window to my yard wondering if I should hire a landscaper or just put in 37 miles of plant beds as a weekend project; when I am doing absolutely everything but being mindful and still and being here now.
My out-of-mind away messages, while feeling existentially unique and agonizing, are far from uncommon, however. Like so many people, I keep the power of zillions of carefully-engineered distractions within arm's reach most or all of my day (and night). Don't want to focus on a project or feel your feelings or do the hard thing that makes you grow? You don't have to! Practice a foreign language for an hour and then another pouring different colors of stacked "water" from tube to tube endlessly all without even getting out of your chair (or while jogging in place, in my case). Feeling a way about your current reality? Press that social media button and two hours and a growling stomach later, you look up to see that it's dark and you're pretty sure you dislike everyone, even or especially, yourself. (It was such times as these that prompted my first formal foray into the digital detox in 2020, as instructed by Cal Newport's book Digital Minimalism.)
Jeff, teach me your ways!
But seriously: How to Break Up With Your Phone lays out a wonderfully, no-nonsense 30-day plan for the seriously addicted to wake-up and break-up and eventually make-up with their phones, but in a more fulfilling way that is the product of open-eyed consciousness and intention. While I will be using her methods, I have already done some of the steps (out of order) in my own journey and my own next step is relocating the charging of my phone (and Apple watch and airpods) away from my bed and out of my bedroom, which despite my own longtime awareness of how important it is (any electronics in the bedroom are anathema to rest and peace in the bedroom, says Feng Shui), has taken some time to talk myself into actually doing it.
Tonight is the first night without it. Here I go! See you back here soon.
Ready for your own digital detox or other habit change, but need a little hand-holding? If you are ready to embark on a restorative journey of creation that supports and nurtures you every day as you do whatever you're meant to do in life, I would be so honored to be your coach.
I offer group courses, virtual organizing, feng shui consultations, and 1:1 coaching on your timeline to meet your needs. Visit the contact page of my site to book a session or send me a message to set up a discovery call.
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